Leaving the Known

In five days, I leave for Peru.

Today is the last full day I will spend in NY before I leave the country. Today is also the last full day I will spend in this house - ever. It is a strange feeling, knowing that your life is about to change pretty drastically and not only by one factor. My parents and I have lived here for almost 15 years and my father has turned what he bought as quite frankly, a mess, into a charming and welcoming home. Now, we are selling it and moving to a new town. Some people I know have lived in the same house their whole lives and feel no real attachment to it. Not so with me. I have purposely explored every inch of this property, getting to know it like a friend. I have specific memories attached to certain parts of the house and yard, landmarks of how I have grown as a person. Yes, I am very sentimental.

Some might say that I am too attached to passing things, especially in the light of a missionary calling. They are right. Probably the biggest lesson I have been learning in all of this preparation is that you can't hold on to anything except for God. I have been reminded of that phrase, "You can't take it with you," every time I feel like holding tightly onto what I have. It's not just because it won't fit in my suitcase (you can't fit an acre of land in, trust me) but because GOD HAS BETTER THINGS IN STORE FOR ME THAN MY PAST. All of my experiences, whether pleasant or painful, have been overseen and orchestrated by my loving heavenly Father. No object or piece of land has taught me anything, but rather has been a tool that He used to show Himself to me. That is what I long for, to see Him more clearly. To love like Him. To be more like Him. Holding on to what I know makes me comfortable is the best way to stall that kind of growth.

So, as I finish packing my suitcase and prepare to have my life changed (which is something you cannot really ever prepare for, it's always a surprise), my eyes must be locked on my Savior. There's no denying the pain of leaving behind what I love, but with Him at the helm there is no need for fear. As I write this I can't help but smile, my heart beating in anticipation of what we will do together in the coming days! A new chapter, a new adventure!